My Masthead

A Masthead:

The tallest point of a ship, your vantage point.  Where you climb to see everything that’s going on.

Last year in the dead of winter, I became aware of a day loing writing residency at the Herman Melville Estate, Arrowhead.

Some spots opened up, I wrote about really wanting to go, and one of My kindest subscribers and supporters actually sent Me the money to be able to go.

So the day came, and it came up so quick!  So the way it  works is, you get use of one of four lil mini writing studios on Herman Melville’s property.  They are all named after different writers and styled and built to include some design elements.

I chose  the Thoreau lookout.  Which  was designed with reference to the conservator at Mount Greylock, where he wrote much of his work!

Little did I know it was the longest hike to that unit…..so, I hiked ona  hot hot day with like, leather writing bags and notebooks falling out of My bag and the bag falling off My shoulder, in My crocs. It was quite hilarious.  After all that hiking I found I didn’t bring My lighter or My bug candle so I had to go all the way back down  then back up again and wow that was a workout.

The actual physical space was amazing.  It had awesome windows you could open, a skylight, so much fresh air and bright  sunlight!

I wrote and wrote and wrote, I wrote so much My hands were cramping!

I smoked joints, took a break for lunch, and put My feet in the grass and wrote some more.

I took a break and hiked back down and then took  the official tour of the Melville Estate, and the barn where he sat and talked with Nathaniel Hawthorne and everything.

I got to  see the desk where he sat and wrote Moby Dick.

Check out the  view:

I got to sit on the front porch and look at the mountains.

I sat under  trees Herman Melville planted and I walked in the woods he used to walk to go visit  his secret lover.

It was all really amazing.

I had such an amazing time.

It was exhausting too.  Draining physically mentally and emotionally.

WTF was I writing you may ask?  I’m working on a book.  A book about  My life.  The time has come for that.

I sat and did a rough outline, origin stories, and which characters I would include and all that.

It took alot out of Me.

Now, I do not yet have a publisher or release date or anything like  that yet, it’s the very early stages.  But if you know anything about Me you know I get shit done, and follow through with My intentions.  And My intentions are to write a motherfucking book.

It felt great to  put in some real work towards this goal, on a property so much had been accomplished  before.

Now, I have always loved the greats and read them at  a young age.  Hawthorne, Melville.  Here in Western MA I’ve taken some real time to go to locations where great writers worked, and  we have so many!  Dubois, Wharton, Dickinsons, Sylvia Plath! Julia Child!

On top of that all these classic artists like Norman Rockwell and Chesterfield, Tom Patti.

And how bout the live music we have here like holy shit! Places ,like Tanglewood,Jacobs Pillow, and all of the many museums we have.

We have a ton of well known musical artists, writers, painters and comic book artists here as well, who may not be as famous as these classical authors listed above but who are major culture makers.

People come from all over the world to enjoy it.

I get to do it all the timme. I get to live it

It’s so amazing, Electric really when you think about it.

I am really glad I get to experience that and be around that energy and all the ART!

I feel like I’m exactly where I wanna be.

I went that day, in sweatpants, with no makeup on and a sports bra and crocs.

When I got there, I was so inspired to take nudes because of the beautiful natural light.

Also: don’t tell them but I most def walked around the path nude for a little bit.  It was so satisfying.  I love being naked outside in the fresh air.

I am sharing them all here with you, enjoy!

A very special THANK YOU to My special supporter who made this day happen for Me, it meant so very much. (You know who you are, and are receiving a very special thank you in the mail in the coming weeks!)

ANd, here’s some real high quality foot pics to reward you if you’ve read this far:

And now I am sharing a piece of writing I wrote at the end of My residency at Arrowhead.  Some writing about writing:

I huff and puff My way to My Masthead.

Dragging leather bags filled with books and notebooks and bug spray

Another bag filled with My lunch and snacks

I arrive and open everything up

My cedar box with skylights.

Wind coming from all four directions.

I marvel at the sunlight

The smell of warm cedar.

I take off My shirt so the  air can hit My skin.

I take off My shoes and dig My toes into the grass.

I take photos of angles and shadows

I lay out  My notebooks meticulously

And make a list of what I want to accomplish

It’s strong work lofty work

I complete it.

Book outline

List of characters

Some journaling

I write about the moon

I identify plants

I take a hike

I get a  tour and afterwards

Sit on the porch staring at those same mountains

Melville himself stared at.

I squat and pee in the woods.

I let a tourist take My photo

I listen to a playlist

I listen to crickets

I listen to the wind.

I eat and I piss

And I jerk off

I take all My clothes off

And dare to feel the sun on My pale ass

I stare at the skylight

I write some more

I write til My hands cramp up

I have to  shake it  out

I  think alot about Sarah  Morewood

And her black stallion

Taunting Melville

Becoming.

I think alot about all the sexual tension and queer energy the place holds

I reckon Melville would have liked Me.

He loved tattooed ladies.

The last thing on My to do list

Is to write a poem

I conquer  that too

Hike back

Hydrated and satiated

Feeling grateful

THIS FEELING SHOULD BE FREE!

THANK YOU for our support all of you!